May 3, Houston: The big one -- the Inprint reading -- occurs at the Alley Theatre on Monday, May 3. Do not miss it or you'll be sorry. I'm not kidding -- I'm going to say the craziest, most intellectual yet hilarious stuff I can think of, and I'll be sharing the stage with the ultra sexy Oscar Casares, too.
June 24, Houston: I'm one of the peeps scheduled to read at Poison Pen, at Houston's famous Poison Girl bar. Besides me, everyone there will be ultra, *super* sexy. Come see me and drink!
June 26, Washington, DC: I'll be reading at the American Library Association conference. Come on down.
My other blog: Go read my the Houston Chronicle parenting blog (or my ChronMomBlog, as I like to call it) and make sure my kids won't resent me more than other kids resent their own parents.
Buy my new novel, Lone Star Legend. Already did? Well, buy a few more for your friends, then. :)
Sunday, June 24, 2007Why I Like to Spend the Evening with Gilad
He always takes me somewhere nice and mysterious, like an island overlooking skyscrapers and rowing teams. He lays a mat on the grass for us, and then we begin.
He always has a compliment for me. "You're looking slimmer since the last time I saw you." When we move together, he murmurs, "Nice. Yes. Good. You're looking great."
He's very strong and has big muscles, and yet he's always gentle and never pushes me to do things I don't want to do (or can't). He says, "I don't want to lose you. So, if you can't lift your leg on this part, just stick with our original lunge step."
He plays cheesy trance music, and yet it gets my heart beating and so I don't mind.
He overlooks my flaws. "Take out your big weights now," he says. "For women, that means five to eight pounds." I take out my 15.5 ounce cans of fruit cocktail, and he doesn't say a word.
Although plenty of women in turquoise, cleavage-revealing leotards flock to his side, he never gives me a reason to be jealous. He adjusts their triceps and tells them, "Okay, Danielle, you're looking good," but I know he doesn't feel the same way about them as he does about me.
However, when he stops to touch the leotard-ed men in the back, I do have to wonder.
My man Gilad.
Other Videos of Importance
A gay boy wished for a planet full of unicorns, y'all. Planet Unicorn, hey:
I once got sucked into a marathon of this show on Thanksgiving day, making us late for my boyfriend's family's luncheon. "Quit watching that shit," he said. "It's not even that funny." But he was wrong. It is that funny. Kung Faux:
Labels: pop culture9:34 PM #
Comments:I look exactly like that dude every time I work out in front of the ocean with a small squad of attractive women.
# posted by Mike : 1:17 PM
Does your exercise dude REALLY tell you that you look slimmer?
Because if so, I might just have to cheat on unitard guy. All these months, and not one comment on the weight I have lost.
# posted by : 7:30 PM
Mike: Somehow, I knew that about you.
Anon: He did say it one time. Right at the beginning, he goes, "You're looking slimmer already since we started doing this."
And I was like, "Aw, HELL yeah!" Because, before that episode, I'd only seen one other, and I watched it on my couch. But he was right - I was totally slimmer.
I'm thinking about leaving my boyfriend for Gilad, because my boyfriend only remarks on my weight loss after prompting.
# posted by Gwen : 10:14 AM
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