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Monday, October 02, 2006
The Ren TestWe went to the Renaissance Festival on Saturday, like dummies, in the hot sun. I thought, at one point, that I might die of low blood sugar and dehydration. And yet we all had fun, I think. As our friend Richard explained it, "All these women are hot. And they're medieval."
Sunday Laundry List
Then, on Sunday, my loud, dirty cousins came over. Tad made fried rice. We all played DDR and drank wine. Then we ate birthday cake to celebrate the twelth-birthday-en-ing of my middle child. Also, we looked at my sexy, sexy bead collection and made plans to attend Houston's October bead show with wholesale license in hand. Woo hoo - domestic bliss.
Female Trouble News Update
I forgot to say that the week before I saw the endocrinologist, I got off the effing Pill.
I'm the kind of person, my friend Rose observes, who lives in the moment when it comes to relationships. I'm a creature of experience. If I'm with a person and they do something weird, I just roll with it. I like to go with the flow. Sometimes someone will annoy me, and I'll say, "Don't do that. That's annoying." But it's never a big drama. I don't like confrontation or ultimatums to ruin a good time.
Then, a year or so later, I'll be sitting at home alone, and it will suddenly occur to me that I don't like a certain person anymore. Suddenly, every annoying thing they've done will parade through my mind, and I'll decide that that person is no longer my friend.
"Just like that?" asks Rose.
Yes. Just like that. Because, by then, I've already lived through several instances of telling a certain person, "Please don't do that. That's annoying. Please don't be mean to my kids," or "Please don't tell me how to conduct my romantic life," or "Please don't spy on me while I'm in the shower."
And the person keeps doing it. They know I don't like it, but they don't stop.
At that point, in my mind, there's no reason to continue hanging out with that person. At the same time, there's definitely no reason to have a big dramatic conversation with the person, in which I issue ultimatums. "I want you to apologize for poking me in the eye with your chopstick three times, and promise you'll never do it again, or I'm not going to be your friend anymore."
What's the point? I don't have time to teach people how to behave decently. That's not my job - I can only do that for my kids. So I quit calling the person. And it's over.
So, two weeks ago, I did the same thing with the Pill.
They put me on the Pill a year ago to make the double periods stop. They did stop, but, at the same time, I felt tired. And, as I explained to Rose, they affected my mind. Instead of fantasizing about pretty men with black hair, I found myself fantasizing about lemon-filled donuts. All the time. Nothing meant anything to me. I felt like a fat rabbit in a warm hutch, lying down waiting for my next meal all the time.
And then, the double periods came back. And then, I went back to the gynecologist, and she told me, paraphrased, "A year ago I put you on the Pill to stop the double periods, and now your double periods have returned. And, since then, you've gained 15 pounds. I know... Maybe losing weight will stop the double periods. Try losing 15 pounds."
It took me a while to figure it out, and to connect all the annoyances in my mind, but then I did and I decided to get the hell off the Pill.
Go to hell, Pill. I'm not calling you anymore. You were never my friend, and I'm not going to bother asking you to change.
I feel better already. As PJ Harvey would say, I'm happy and bleeding. (And nauseated.) But that's better than bleeding and lethargic, isn't it?
Book Corner
Recently I read Oryx and Crake (by Margaret Atwood), and less recently I read Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, finally. I enjoyed them both very much. If you haven't read those yet, you should check them out. Unless you don't like science fictiony or magicky things, I mean.
Now I'm reading (maybe rereading?) The Beggar Maid, by Alice Munro. She reminds me of Atwood, even though I probably shouldn't lump them together just because they're both Canadian and write about children bullying each other near bridges.
Also, as far as not-books are concerned, I've been reading Project Rungay. Go there now, because that shit is super hilarious. 8:46 AM #
Comments:
I can totally sympathize with your going off the pill. I went on it last year, and I had never felt so exhausted and depressed. Oh my god, so depressed. And my breakouts, which had always been mild, got much worse despite predictions they would improve. I know that some women can take the pill and be totally fine with it, but I just wanted to post and say, I feel your pain.(BTW, about the double periods thing, did your dr suggest that you might not be ovulating? This happened to my sister - she had them for YEARS and it turned out that she was having an anovulatory cycle (I don't know why). It eventually resolved on its own.)
# posted by
Amber Kelly : 11:57 AM
Amber: Thanks for telling me. It's good not to be the only one.
And, yeah, that's what we're investigating this month - whether or not I'm ovulating. I'm taking my temp every morning. I think if I'm not, he'll have evidence to support his theory that I'm doing early menopause. I wonder what your sister had, though. Maybe PCOS?
# posted by
Gwen : 12:01 PM
I can sympathize too. I've been on it for roughly a decade, and for the first four years or so I was naseous all the time. Then I finally got it switched to a different version, and although it doesn't make me want to throw up, it has made me constantly hungry and overly emotional. And killed my libido. The pill sucks. I'm dying to get off it, but I can't come up with another workable form of birth control.
Good luck with figuring all the medical stuff out.
# posted by
kate : 4:15 PM
That post about Nina somebody is really excellent. The only Colombian woman I know fits the bit about the hair: "Just tame enough to be considered professional-looking and just wild enough to make people wonder what she looks like naked."
# posted by
olive & rose : 11:55 PM
I love how your gyno is connecting your weight to the double periods, even though that's why you came to her in the first place before you had actually gained the weight. I'm getting kind of tired of doctors just assuming that weight is automatically the problem for nearly every health complaint instead of actually investigating the problem--doubly so for women. I bet doctors don't automatically tell guys to lose weight when something is wrong with their plumbing!
Also, this is kind of random, but there was an *awesome* interview with Tim Gunn earlier this summer that had a lot of dirt on season two:
http://featuresblogs.chicagotribune.com/entertainment_tv/2006/07/talking_with_ti.html
# posted by
Kimberly : 12:42 AM
I was on the pill for a year about 10 years ago. During that year, I was hideously depressed, cried at the drop of a hat (to the extent that my friends no longer asked me what was wrong when I started crying - they just let me get it out), and was generally miserable.
Coincidentially, my depression ended right around the time I stopped taking the pill. It was scary how much it affected my personality. I'll never go back on it.
# posted by
Alice : 7:22 AM
One thing to keep in mind is that there are lots of different versions of "the" Pill. The first one I ever went on was awesome. My skin cleared up, I *lost* weight, I felt emotionally stable and I had three day periods. When I got a different job and switched insurance plans, they would only put me on one kind of pill (not the one I wanted) and it turned me into a raging lunatic. It took me a little while to make the connection, but that's when I switched gynos to find one who would listen to me about what my body needed.
# posted by
Kimberly : 2:15 PM
Hi Gwen,
Good for you!
I hate the pill, when I took it 26 years ago it gave me a double period. then after having my baby 15 years ago it gave me migraines. So I quit!
Janice~
# posted by
Janice : 12:23 AM
yay renfest! i was there on saturday, too, and it was damned hot. there's nothing like wearing a corset in 90degree weather. maybe i should switch to chain mail...
# posted by
curvature : 8:19 AM
Kate: Are you on Apri? Because you have the same symptoms I did. And, yes, it sucks so bad that that's the best we can do as far as birth control. Mamas, let your girl babies grow up to be scientists.
Rose: Ha. Freaking Columbians and their sexiness.
Kimberly: Word! Shoot, I can't even imagine a doctor telling a man that. Thanks for the Tim link.
Alice: I'm glad you're off of it. Congratulations for stopping the madness.
Kimberly again: I know... It's just such a massive pain in the ass to do the trial and error. If only they had it mapped out, like ".002 mg estrogen lowers sex drive, .00008 progesteron causes hunger..."
Janice: Congratulations. Screw the Pill. I'm so over it.
Curvature: I didn't see you there. Did you see me? But that chick that you've identified on your MySpace as Morgaine? I see her every time and have a photo of her, too. Do you know her IRL?
# posted by
Gwen : 11:44 AM
no, i didn't see you there. i was only around from about 9:00am - 12:30pm, though. i see that lady every year (around sherwood forest), too, and last year she identified herself as morgaine. i don't know her in real life, though.
did i see on your flickr that one of your kiddos did the jumpy thing? mine did and she had a blast.
# posted by
curvature : 5:06 PM
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