Gwen's blog

Current Events

May 3, Houston: The big one -- the Inprint reading -- occurs at the Alley Theatre on Monday, May 3. Do not miss it or you'll be sorry. I'm not kidding -- I'm going to say the craziest, most intellectual yet hilarious stuff I can think of, and I'll be sharing the stage with the ultra sexy Oscar Casares, too.

June 24, Houston: I'm one of the peeps scheduled to read at Poison Pen, at Houston's famous Poison Girl bar. Besides me, everyone there will be ultra, *super* sexy. Come see me and drink!

June 26, Washington, DC: I'll be reading at the American Library Association conference. Come on down.

My other blog: Go read my the Houston Chronicle parenting blog (or my ChronMomBlog, as I like to call it) and make sure my kids won't resent me more than other kids resent their own parents.

Buy my new novel, Lone Star Legend. Already did? Well, buy a few more for your friends, then. :)

Sunday, May 30, 2004
fish in the sea, frogs to be kissed, carnival atmosphere

Last night we went out. I'm charged to say, when mentioning dancing with Jennifer, that she danced with a Long Island Iced Tea in her hand - not a screwdriver.

The club was fun - full of danceable music and amiable hipsters, but it was so very, very hot and humid. I thought their AC had stopped working but the guy said, no, it was set to 60 degrees and that that just couldn't compensate for "600 people". But, really, I don't think there were actually 600 whole people there.

I said, before we hit the clubs, that I wasn't going to try to talk to any men because of the shell-shock and all. But then they just went ahead and talked to me, and, well, gosh dang it, I'll shoot the bull with anybody.

I'll talk to a guy on the dance floor just like I'll talk to an elderly woman in the check-out line. Or like I talked to everyone around me in the nail salon yesterday afternoon. A woman treating herself for once - lots of callouses to remove and the blue stuff tickled her toes. A man treating himself to the ultimate/everything pedicure while his teenaged sons shopped the mall within cell phone's reach. He said a monthly pedicure was his substitute for a wife. One of the manicurists was working on learning English. She said bowl instead of bottle. When her coworkers corrected her with chagrin, she appealed to us clients, saying that that made her think of a baby bottle. We all laughed. The massage chairs and jacuzzi jets felt good. My lady said I had hardly any callouses at all, since I have my nails done more regularly. I lowered my eyes while the strangers enviously watched her touch my feet. Even though there's no reason to be ashamed for spending freelance money on a little health and beauty.

So I talked to some guys last night and one gave me his card and whatever, whatever - I see now that there are a million fish in the sea - no, it's actually more like Galveston where the fish are jumping out of the water and sometimes littering the beach - they're everywhere, in your sushi and everything, so you never have to worry that you might run out of guys to talk to. And then, everyone says you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince, and I see that now, and it makes perfect sense. But I don't feel like kissing frogs, princes or anyone today. And I think the whole thing (catching fish, kissing frogs) sounds just like a video game. So I'll treat it like one - as something to do when I'm not busy - something to play with when I have the time and inclination to move pixels around a screen.

and then

We went to IHOP afterwards and I devoured my Cheddar Turkey Melt like a monster. Then it was 5 AM and I went to sleep. Now it's almost one and my guts feel hot - I think someone gave me some germs. I'm supposed to work on my galleys (Why is that plural all the time? It is supposed to be, right?) but I don't have the Post-Its that I need. Can't do it without Post-Its. But I'm supposed to go do all this stuff today so I don't know if I'll have time to buy any. Excuses, excuses.

freaking Mervyns

I hate it when I wake up from a night of drinking/dancing and my guts feel sort of hot and I have a lot of important stuff to do, but then I come across a receipt that says "Enter a sweepstakes to win a $1000 shopping spree! Just fill out our survey at www.mervynssurvey.com!" and it's like, I have to do it, because the woman so painstakingly pointed it out to me with a green highlighter when I was in their store the other day.

So I go to do the survey and it's simple enough except that, for my ethnic background, I can pick White, or I can pick Hispanic/Latino, but I can't pick both. But I am both. But radio buttons don't let you express your bothness. And it made me sad because, for the nine hundred seventeen billionth time, I had to think about the bothness and what it means to me, not just in the context of filling out surveys, but in the context of everything. And then, like I always do, I clicked the button of my people. The people who raised me. (The brown ones, I mean.)

But before they tricked me into choosing between my forebears like that, they asked me how Mervyns could serve me better. And I wish they hadn't, because I really just didn't have the time to explain to them everything they so desperately need to know. I mean - damn, they'd have to put me on the marketing payroll. Or just let me be a buyer a something. I kept it brief - pointing out a few forks in the road where they'd gone wrong. And then I summed it up by telling them that people used to say "Kohls is like Mervyns" and that was a good enough thing to say. But that now, in my mind, Mervyns has become like Sears.

I know, I know - very harsh. I didn't want to hurt their feelings. But they seriously needed to know.
 

12:21 PM #

Comments:

 Mostly, I'm horrified you went to IHOP and didn't eat pancakes. I take it as a personal affront.


# posted by Blogger Drew : 7:09 PM  

 No, no, no. Low carb. I am low carbing it.

I watched someone else eat pancakes at our table, if that makes you feel better.


# posted by Blogger Gwen : 7:28 PM  

 Gwen you found it?
The allusive unfindable mervynssurvey.com web sight?
I can't find it, sob sob.
I just find shoppingBasicz.com, I think that web sight is holding up mervynssurvey.com for ransome some where!
Any advice to a lost web surfer?
I like IHOP too. My husband and I went there today and ordered the country omlet, my fave. But they got the order mixed or something and we got plan ham and chesse omlets insteed. Well at lest they nock off a couple of buck for the mistake. By the way we ate them anyway.

Jan


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 7:19 PM  

 Gwen you mentioned frogs?

May the light always find you on a dreary day.
When you need to be home, may you find your way.
May you always have courage to take a chance.
And never find frogs in your underpants.
an old scandinavian saying.
I just wanted to share.
Jan (again)


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 7:28 PM  

 Gwen,
Sorry to have bothered you. I found it! ShoppingBasicz.com didn't have Mervynssurvey.com kidnapped or held hostage, or what ever it was I said earlier.
I did a more exstensive search, (I worked them search engines), and it popped up. Or maybe floated up to the surface out of the murk would be more like it.
Anyway good luck with your book.
Jan


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 8:17 PM  

 I'm also trying to get my $1000 shopping spree from Mervyn's; that's how I found your website. And I'll be damned if MY receipt isn't scribbled all over with that green highlighter! Only my cashier was more adamant about my remembering her name, Nedra, which she scrawled next to my user ID, pointed at it AND repeated it in case I can't read, I guess. Does she get a commission if I win? If I do win, maybe I'll buy her a purse or pair of socks-on sale of course!-for turning me on to this sweepstakes. Good luck winning yourself! Tracy


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 1:50 PM  

 And you too Tracy!
Jan


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 10:24 PM  

 as a long time former employee at mervyn's, i can tell you why all the surveys are highlighted with the sales persons name. if you give the 'team member' a good comment, she will be recognized highly by her store manager, and in my store, receive a $5 gift card! it's all about the positive feedback. by the way, in years past, as we hit 'years of service' recognitions, we recieved nice gifts (clocks, radios, restaurant gift certificates etc). now, the gifts are small amount gift cards, which forces us to spend money in the store. they sure got cheap over the years. i left for higher ground.


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 8:16 PM  

 OK, I actually LIKE Mervyns and I'm by no means a computer whiz, but I, too had trouble finding the darn survey. This is the first time I have ever written to a computer site, but finding this Gwen stuff was a bonus. I'm going right out and buy her book. Maybe get my toes polished, too. Gwen, perhaps Mervyns should sell your book.


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 9:26 AM  

 This is strange!


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 8:46 PM  

 I can't believe Mervyns is part of this


# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 8:49 PM  

 Thanks, Jan. Thanks, anonymous person. I'm glad y'all stuck around.

*************
IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THE MERVYN'S SURVEY:
*************

This site has nothing to do with Mervyn's. I am a writer. This is my personal web site. As you can see above, I wrote a little story about filling out the Mervyn's survey. That is why your web search has led you to this site.

HERE IS THE *REAL* MERVYN'S SURVEY LINK:
Copy this link and paste it into the Address bar at the top of your screen:
http://www.mervynssurvey.com

Also, please have a nice day.


# posted by Blogger Gwen : 11:01 PM  

 And, just in case, here is the link that mervynssurvey.com takes you to:

http://www.daisurvey.com/cdr/s020335cdr07/Index.asp


# posted by Blogger Gwen : 11:02 PM  

 Hey girl, I'm suppose to be working right now - earning a living but I've been to Mervyn's 3x in the past 2 weeks and have 3 fricken survey's to fill out. This is when I found your site. I must be bored, because I read your story about going out then going to Mervyn's and honestly, I found it entertaining. It's a bitch being a single girl for many reasons but the main is that there are way more frogs than princes' out there and that is truly a sad, sad thing. The other day I was standing in line at the local Starbucks when I sparked up a conversation with the guy ahead of me in line. The line was long so we chatted for a while then chatted again after we got our coffee's. We exchanged email addresses then emails then he asked me out for a cup. I was like, uh ok until he mentioned that he doesn't really drink coffee, espeically over priced coffee from the likes of Starbucks but he recv'd a gift card for his birthday and was going to buy me a cup-o-joe from the card. HELLO! What an idiot! I have to be honest, he appeared to be "sponge worthy" while chatting but after he laid that news on me, FOR-GET-IT! Kiss a frog? NO THANK YOU! I don't want to get warts on my lips. :O)
Have a great day!


# posted by Blogger D_Diane_D : 2:29 PM  

 I like to thank evreone who work's for merveny's becuse evre time I go shoping they help me to get what i need. thank you


# posted by Blogger frank : 12:47 PM  

 I enjoy shopping at Mervyns I'm there at least 8 times a month.


# posted by Blogger jenoveva21 : 12:42 AM  

 i think your rude and dumb,so big deal about the dumb survey.get a life!!!


# posted by Blogger mexcujap : 10:02 PM  

 Mexcujap, I think you're awesome. Jesus and I love you. Please come back soon.


# posted by Blogger Gwen : 10:29 PM  

 I just filled out the pinche survey for the millionth time and I found your website, I am very excited to read your book. So, there, the blasted Mervyn's survey is good for something! It led me to you. I better win.


# posted by Blogger Lucat : 11:55 AM  

 Sorry, no Web results were found...
That is what I got when I got to the middle of your postings and tried that link... nada, in your words. I am thinking it will work in Spanish (I thought I was Mexican until I was about 4, being born and raised in Santa Ana, CA) but nope, it didn't work in Spanish either... NOW I am cursing in BOTH languages. Anyway, I wanted to take the damn survey cuz the store in Huntington Beach on Brookhurst and Adams has gone to hell in a handcart. Always clothes on the floor, can rarely find a salesperson, and when I do, they might as well be working at Home Depot! Are they closing that store? Is that why all of the sale crap is there? Where is the slightly new stuff? Geeze. Estoy cansada ya. Thank you for listening... er, uh, reading. Be blessed all, and I will see you at Target! Cat


# posted by Anonymous Cat Jack : 2:06 PM  

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